Searching For Desire

Just a little over two months ago, I was starting to build a readership. Yes, maybe not large, but a real readership. Why did I let all that go? Laziness. Maybe. I think, really, I was just bored. Unimaginative. Or better yet, I had no desire to blog. Which has been the theme of my summer. NO DESIRE. Not for anything real. It’s just been the same old monotonous get up, go to work, eat lunch, go to work, come home, watch TV, sleep, day-to-day cycle. This also leads me to the new theme of the site: Empty Words. I’ve had no words to say for an entire two months. Or the words that I have had to say or that I should have said are sitting on an blank piece of paper.

Now, don’t get me wrong. I have enjoyed relaxing at night. It’s been a nice break. I did keep up with my Body For Life program. I actually lost 26 pounds and 7% body fat since April 3, 2006. That was in the 12 weeks of Challenge 1. I took a few weeks off, and now I’ve completed my first week of Challenge 2. If have desired anything at all this summer, it is my desire to have that rock-hard frame that most men dream of but are too lazy to actually do something about. Of course, I still need to lose another 7%-8% body fat. But, I’ll get there.

The thing is, is that I want to desire again. I want to want again. Maybe that’s why I’m posting tonight. Maybe that’s why I spent a few hours tonight hashing out a new design for the site. Maybe we sometimes have to make ourselves desire.